Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.” (Ecclesiastes 4:9–12, NASB 95)
What is a lone wolf? It’s a wolf that gets separated from its pack. That’s what wolves are. They are meant to run in packs. Protection. Food. Care. All are necessary for the wolf to survive and flourish.
But what happens if a wolf gets separated from its pack? All these benefits are gone. The wolf wanders the countryside, avoiding other packs that might threaten him, searching for the basics of life the pack would normally provide.
Younger wolves might grow strong and challenge an older alpha of another pack. If he wins in this case, he becomes leader of that pack, and all is good.
However, many lone wolves simply vanish into their surroundings. They are careful not to howl too much because that could lead to a hostile pack locating them. These listless animals simply die lonely and destitute.
Okay. Granted, we aren’t wolves. We are uniquely created and endowed human beings, representing our Creator in this world.
We do, however, share more characteristics with the pack than we may think. The most important? We were created for community. Yet, sometimes, people “separate from the pack,” so to speak. They become “lone wolves,” leaving society and association behind.
What does the Bible say about this? Solomon tells us it’s a bad way to go. The lone wolf isn’t the strong “rugged individualist” so many make him out to be. He’s simply a self-centered individual who wants to control his own little piece of this universe.
Life doesn’t work that way. Let’s see what wise Solomon had to say:
What’s Wrong with the “Lone Wolf” Mentality?
The fact is, being a lone wolf puts all kinds of pressure on one person. Solomon says “woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.” The person who has no one to help will never find help. When failure comes, and it will come, who is there to take up the slack for the lone wolf?
He has no answer for this.
In addition, the lone wolf creates inefficiency at all levels in his life. Marriage is a wonderful example of another truism, that something can be greater than the sum of its parts. When a husband and wife are together on everything, life takes on a whole different efficiency.
That’s one of the reasons why God created marriage. Adam understood this when he said, “The two shall be one.” (Genesis 2) Those two function with the efficiency of one but still have the output of both. As Solomon explains that “they have a good return for their labor.”
What does the lone wolf do? He has to handle all of it on his own. He has to muscle through struggles in lonely solitude. As he does so, he has less motivation than someone who has a partner to share the load.
Also, being alone produces pride. A person who has that “rugged individual” extreme will pride himself in his ability to do it with “no one’s help” but his own. Although it isn’t a lock, many times that kind of thinking leads to a self-sufficient pride that flies in the face of what we are as Christians.
A lone wolf boasts he can do it all himself. The Christian knows he has to rely on God for his strength. Solomon, the most powerful and wisest man in the world at the time knew this well.
The lone wolf mentality also creates loneliness and depression. He may think he can go at it on his own. However, his mindset leads to isolation. What’s wrong with this? Can’t a person survive on his own?
The answer is yes. Some people spend their lives alone in isolation. But we still have to consider how successful he will be. Put another way, we have to ask whether such a person is truly happy being alone.
In other words, it’s much easier for “two to stay warm.”
The lone wolf has only himself and his own warmth. At the end of life he asks, “Who do I have to take care of me in my old age?” “What companionship do I have?” “Where do I go from here?”
The lone wolf is truly lonely.
What Is the Alternative?
A community creates a healthy human being. God created us for community. That’s one very active principle at the heart of church attendance. We gather together, partially, because we need each other. Simply put, God created us for each other.
But don’t take my word for it. Here’s what Solomon said:
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.”
“If two lie down together they keep warm.”
“A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.”
All this means that there is truly strength in numbers. Community is important and a God-given mandate.
A great example of this is how God set up the Ten Commandments. Many see these as moral guidelines to direct an individual or society. Although they are all that, God had a specific purpose in mind.
If we look carefully, we can see that these commands break up naturally into two parts. The first four are all about relationship with God. These are the most important principles. If we get these wrong, we get the whole thing wrong.
However, the last six tell us a lot about what God intends for human life. These six principles pertain to how we treat others. In other words, life isn’t simply learning how to please God. It also includes how we treat others
As with what Solomon wrote in our passage today, the Ten Commandments have everything to do with relationship. Relationship with God primarily. Relationship with other people residually. We have to have both to be what God intended us to be.
Anything less than having a community to rally around us produces loneliness, isolation and inefficiency. This runs contrary to God’s principles and leads to an unhealthy person.
So What?
We need each other. It can’t be put any simpler than that. For those of us who follow Christ, we need other believers so that we can be happy and healthy believers ourselves.
No. I’m not suggesting it takes a village to raise a child. God left that job in the hands of loving parents, and that responsibility stays there. However, if you have a village that’s on your side and embraces the same values you do, you can better do what God has called you to do.
This means we need to be in church with other believers. This means our closest and most cherished relationships should be with other believers. This means we need to find a way to do more than just get along with each other. We must see every believer as a brother and sister who gives us meaning, purpose and a reason for ministry.
After all, God gave Jesus Christ to us to walk that lonely road of sin and punishment as He journeyed to the cross so that we wouldn’t have to. God gave us a new community through the suffering of His Son. We must show our appreciation by being part of the community that Christ built: God’s family, the church.
So don’t be a lone wolf. Find your godly pack, and run with them. Then watch God work.
Journeys of a Former Firebrand 
Leave a comment